Knitting in the car on the way to Montauk.
Last night I tried to install a bunch of different new themes for this blog and I was getting super-frustrated. But then I remembered how all knitting books always have a paragraph that says something like, “You’re smart! You can knit socks!” or whatever, and I was like, “YES I CAN!” (<–I am sure President Obama will not mind me stealing his motto to use for learning how to use CoreFTP.)
I mean, if I can knit a pair of socks, you would think I would be able to learn enough coding to modify my own blog, right? Well, I was doing okay, and even changing colors in templates and such, but then I realized that my new chosen theme was not accepting my Flickr WordPress widget to create thumbnails and I had a little bit of a mind meltdown. So I went to bed. But I did have to give myself a pep talk. I realized that reading knitting directions are a kind of separate language, and I can read music and speak four human languages (badly, but enough to be able to buy food and find the bathroom, and that’s all that matters), so I should be able to understand PHP. And many many years ago, I did take deductive geometry, though there was a minute when I was scanning the “if…then” code that I was like, “Why can’t computer programmers use regular English!?!?!” But then I realized it would be like if knitters wrote out all of their instructions (“knit by creating loop and pulling through, repeat, purl by creating loop in front, repeat” instead of “*k1, p1* repeat until end of the row”), that it would take too long. Cascading style sheets, I will conquer you.
Also, I spent all morning trying to read legislation to figure out how to get the new COBRA subsidy. Dear President Obama, please create a legislation FAQ for dummies on your homepage. Thanks.